I'm so wiped out today. I've be carrying around too much stress from work, and need to realx, because the tension is taking it's toll.
I just wanted to write a quick note, because I finally have a chance to hang out in a hot bathtub this evening, and I just can't pass that up.
SO, I did well with my eating, didn't stay within my points, but I did track it all. I also went to spinning tonight and worked out some of that stress...
Tomorrow, I'm so looking forward to Friday afternoon, when I drive away from work and I don't have to go back for 2 whole days.
Hope you ladies have a fantastic Friday :)
xoxo Gallant
Thursday, February 10, 2011
Wednesday, February 9, 2011
the NEW goal
So I gained .2 lbs last week...Not OK. I know, I know, it's only .2 lbs, but it's not a loss, and I only have myself to thank for that. SO, that's what happens when I don't count everything as accuratly as I should, for not tracking AT ALL on Sunday, and for generally just being a bit of a slacker. I am really dissapointed in myself. What it has given me, is a NEW goal...
I WILL LOSE ANOTHER 5 lbs before my birthday, which is the 21st. THIS is the NEW GOAL.
I've also learned something, yesterday, when I came home from work and found my garage roof collapsed, I went straight to the kitchen, and started eating chips and dip...without out even really being aware of it. As 'after school special' as it sounds, I binge when I'm really freaked out, and I'm not even really aware of what's happening until it's half way over...All I want to do is eat when I'm upset. Just because I don't lock myself in the bathroom while doing it, doesn't make it any less of a disorder...
The topic at WW was quite fitting for me today "Am I really hungry?" A question I've just started to ask myself...
The leader had some good tips...Write down 10 other things I could do instead of eat when I feel like emotional eating and post it on the fridge.
I'm going to work on this list tomorrow, because I really need to crack the code on WHY I eat when I'm not hungry. If I'm not truly hungry for food, what am I hungry for? What does my spirit hunger for? BTW, this is nothing new, I've been comforting myself with food for as long as I can remember.
So, all in all, just another day in the quest to figuring out my issues with food, and myself...
Until tomorrow!!
xoxo Gallant
5 Thankful Things
I snorted when I laughed today...it's totally ugly, but it also means I had a really good, genuine laugh.
Cuddling with my Jonesy puppy in the morning. I let him sneak his 80lb butt into our bed after my husband goes to work and we get cozy. He's like a giant alive teddy bear :)
I didn't gain .3 lbs, I guess that would be worse...
People who believe in me, even when I don't beleive in myself.
Being able to radiate love and compassion to people who may deserve otherwise...
I WILL LOSE ANOTHER 5 lbs before my birthday, which is the 21st. THIS is the NEW GOAL.
I've also learned something, yesterday, when I came home from work and found my garage roof collapsed, I went straight to the kitchen, and started eating chips and dip...without out even really being aware of it. As 'after school special' as it sounds, I binge when I'm really freaked out, and I'm not even really aware of what's happening until it's half way over...All I want to do is eat when I'm upset. Just because I don't lock myself in the bathroom while doing it, doesn't make it any less of a disorder...
The topic at WW was quite fitting for me today "Am I really hungry?" A question I've just started to ask myself...
The leader had some good tips...Write down 10 other things I could do instead of eat when I feel like emotional eating and post it on the fridge.
I'm going to work on this list tomorrow, because I really need to crack the code on WHY I eat when I'm not hungry. If I'm not truly hungry for food, what am I hungry for? What does my spirit hunger for? BTW, this is nothing new, I've been comforting myself with food for as long as I can remember.
So, all in all, just another day in the quest to figuring out my issues with food, and myself...
Until tomorrow!!
xoxo Gallant
5 Thankful Things
I snorted when I laughed today...it's totally ugly, but it also means I had a really good, genuine laugh.
Cuddling with my Jonesy puppy in the morning. I let him sneak his 80lb butt into our bed after my husband goes to work and we get cozy. He's like a giant alive teddy bear :)
I didn't gain .3 lbs, I guess that would be worse...
People who believe in me, even when I don't beleive in myself.
Being able to radiate love and compassion to people who may deserve otherwise...
Tuesday, February 8, 2011
Collapse
As in, my garage roof has collapsed under the weight of all of the snow it's accumulated...SON OF A BITCH.
My husband was able to rig it, so it's not totally down, but it's dropped a good 5 feet. Mind you I have been telling him I was concerned about this happening for weeks now, and he kept shrugging me off as his harpy wife who is a worry wart. Needless to say, he feels like an ass for not listening to me. All I keep telling myself, is thank God it's our garage and not our house!
Enough of that lame topic, I have my weigh in tomorrow, I've been less than perfect this week, so we'll see what that looks like on the scale...
I'm keeping it short tonight, I'm feeling a bit stressed out and bewildered and not so in to blogging...I'll be in a better spirit tomorrow, promise ;)
Tomorrow I want to wake up early, to do some ab work and some meditation, wish me luck!
5 Thankful things
Still having a roof on my house
A mini vacation with my besties in March, yay!
Buying new smaller jeans...OH yeah, I did that yesterday!!!
Kindness of a friend/carpenter who has offered to help us with our garage roof for free
Being able to smile and be kind to people, even when I think they're stupid...
xoxo - Gallant
My husband was able to rig it, so it's not totally down, but it's dropped a good 5 feet. Mind you I have been telling him I was concerned about this happening for weeks now, and he kept shrugging me off as his harpy wife who is a worry wart. Needless to say, he feels like an ass for not listening to me. All I keep telling myself, is thank God it's our garage and not our house!
Enough of that lame topic, I have my weigh in tomorrow, I've been less than perfect this week, so we'll see what that looks like on the scale...
I'm keeping it short tonight, I'm feeling a bit stressed out and bewildered and not so in to blogging...I'll be in a better spirit tomorrow, promise ;)
Tomorrow I want to wake up early, to do some ab work and some meditation, wish me luck!
5 Thankful things
Still having a roof on my house
A mini vacation with my besties in March, yay!
Buying new smaller jeans...OH yeah, I did that yesterday!!!
Kindness of a friend/carpenter who has offered to help us with our garage roof for free
Being able to smile and be kind to people, even when I think they're stupid...
xoxo - Gallant
Monday, February 7, 2011
PHEW!
I can't believe 2 days has gone by and I haven't blogged. This weekend was busy and hectic, and I feel like I didn't get a moment to myself...well I got a little bit on Saturday morning...
I went to yoga Saturday morning, it was so nice, but I over did it a little, and I feel really sore!
Yesterday, was so mental busy, I forgot to track my points and blog. Not cool. I honestly, just didn't think about it. I got up, went to work, ran errands, came home to a houseful of guest ready to watch the Superbowl, so I changed, got all the food ready, 'watched' the game, and then went to bed. Phew! It was a fun evening with friends and good times, but I am a person who needs some alone/quiet time during the weekend, and I didn't get it. Oh well, there's always next weekend. Although I didn't track my food, I did eat mindfully, being aware of everything I put into my face. I did eat too much, but nothing compared to the usual bingeing that would have taken over. So, I don't consider yesterday a total FAIL.
Today was better, work routine always gets me back into a healthy schedule. Tomorrow I will continue to eat well, I'll go to spin, and I will pay my bills...My least favorite thing to do!!
Until tomorrow ladies!
xoxo -Gallant
5 Thankful Things
1.My husband and Father-in-laws pure JOY watching their beloved Packers win. So great!!
2.Yoga. It makes me feel amazing.
3. Wine. I really love wine.
4. Friends with trucks. I bought a dresser and my sweet friend brought it home for me today
5. Peace of Mind. I feel relaxed in my brain today. It's a rare feeling for me.
I went to yoga Saturday morning, it was so nice, but I over did it a little, and I feel really sore!
Yesterday, was so mental busy, I forgot to track my points and blog. Not cool. I honestly, just didn't think about it. I got up, went to work, ran errands, came home to a houseful of guest ready to watch the Superbowl, so I changed, got all the food ready, 'watched' the game, and then went to bed. Phew! It was a fun evening with friends and good times, but I am a person who needs some alone/quiet time during the weekend, and I didn't get it. Oh well, there's always next weekend. Although I didn't track my food, I did eat mindfully, being aware of everything I put into my face. I did eat too much, but nothing compared to the usual bingeing that would have taken over. So, I don't consider yesterday a total FAIL.
Today was better, work routine always gets me back into a healthy schedule. Tomorrow I will continue to eat well, I'll go to spin, and I will pay my bills...My least favorite thing to do!!
Until tomorrow ladies!
xoxo -Gallant
5 Thankful Things
1.My husband and Father-in-laws pure JOY watching their beloved Packers win. So great!!
2.Yoga. It makes me feel amazing.
3. Wine. I really love wine.
4. Friends with trucks. I bought a dresser and my sweet friend brought it home for me today
5. Peace of Mind. I feel relaxed in my brain today. It's a rare feeling for me.
Friday, February 4, 2011
Mid Life Crisis, Anyone?
Today was better. Today I got out of doing a 6 month project that I really didn't want to be a part of at work. And best yet, my enemy got stuck with it instead :)~ Karma's a bitch!
Ohhh, work. I'm really not into it. I want to do something else, and I don't know what. I want to go to culinary school, but I don't want to butcher animals, and I'm pretty sure that's part of it. Then I think, pastry school, but then I feel like that is just too narrow...Then I think about opening my own place, but after about 5 minutes, the thought scares the shit out of me. I don't know. I just don't know!
As for food, I did good today, I even got Alisa and I some healthy, albeit, not so totally yummy snacks, but I still made a good choice for us. It helped that I don't eat meat, and she's not eating dairy, so that narrowed the options quite a bit! I loved spending time with her and baby Luca Joe, that little boy is a heart breaker!
So my goal for tomorrow, to really start to figure out what I truly want to do with myself. I need to spend more time reflecting on this so that I have a goal and some direction, because career wise, I feel like I'm just floating around.
So tomorrow, I will be going to yoga, weather permitting (yeah, it's going to snow...AGAIN) I will be making food for super bowl extravaganza, and I will spend some time trying figure out what to do with myself when I grow up.
5 THANKFUL things
My Jonesy, I know I'm a weirdo, but I really love him so much.
Having any job at all. My husband was laid off for 14 months, don't think I don't know how lucky I am to have a paycheck!
Luca Joe's smile, so flippin cute, it made my day!
For losing 10 lbs, that feels good to say.
My friends, all of them, I am so blessed.
xoxo Sisters!! -Gallant
Ohhh, work. I'm really not into it. I want to do something else, and I don't know what. I want to go to culinary school, but I don't want to butcher animals, and I'm pretty sure that's part of it. Then I think, pastry school, but then I feel like that is just too narrow...Then I think about opening my own place, but after about 5 minutes, the thought scares the shit out of me. I don't know. I just don't know!
As for food, I did good today, I even got Alisa and I some healthy, albeit, not so totally yummy snacks, but I still made a good choice for us. It helped that I don't eat meat, and she's not eating dairy, so that narrowed the options quite a bit! I loved spending time with her and baby Luca Joe, that little boy is a heart breaker!
So my goal for tomorrow, to really start to figure out what I truly want to do with myself. I need to spend more time reflecting on this so that I have a goal and some direction, because career wise, I feel like I'm just floating around.
So tomorrow, I will be going to yoga, weather permitting (yeah, it's going to snow...AGAIN) I will be making food for super bowl extravaganza, and I will spend some time trying figure out what to do with myself when I grow up.
5 THANKFUL things
My Jonesy, I know I'm a weirdo, but I really love him so much.
Having any job at all. My husband was laid off for 14 months, don't think I don't know how lucky I am to have a paycheck!
Luca Joe's smile, so flippin cute, it made my day!
For losing 10 lbs, that feels good to say.
My friends, all of them, I am so blessed.
xoxo Sisters!! -Gallant
Thursday, February 3, 2011
-10 lbs. whooot whoooot!
So I FINALLY weighed in today, after 2 weeks of missing my meetings due to the fact that I live in the Fucking North Pole...anyway, I lost 2.6lbs, which got me to official weight loss since starting of 10lbs. Totally cool. I'm really hoping next week will be better, since I won't be all bloated and I'll have worked out a few times instead of sitting on my ass having the flu and eating pizza. MmmmMmmmm, pizza. It's my crack.
I had a really bad day today. I had to hide in a room today to calm down twice so I didn't go postal. Not so Zen of me, I know, but between working with crazy assholes and being menstrual, well, people should be afraid. I have a goal of being a more peaceful person, meditating more, realizing some people are awful and that I can work around it, because I am a better person. But sometimes Ghetto Gallant comes out, and I put my hair in a ponytail, take my earrings out, and I want to throw down. Instead of acting on that, I lock myself in a room until I can get it together, tap my third eye, awaken my peaceful spirit, and make an honest effort not to get arrested at work for physical violence.
So my goal for tomorrow is spend a little time meditating before I go to work. I really need to get myself to a good place before I enter that building again.
OH, and I get to see Alisa and Luca tomorrow too, and I'm so excited to smooch that little man and tell him how handsome he is :)
5 Thankful Things
1. Good Hair. My hair generally never lets me down.
2. Laughter. I love it.
3. My sister, I love our relationship, it's gotten really cool in the last few years.
4. People who say, Mmmmmmmmmm, after they've eaten something I've baked. It's my favorite.
5. Coffee. I'm from Seattle, and I will NEVER give it up. I love it too much.
I had a really bad day today. I had to hide in a room today to calm down twice so I didn't go postal. Not so Zen of me, I know, but between working with crazy assholes and being menstrual, well, people should be afraid. I have a goal of being a more peaceful person, meditating more, realizing some people are awful and that I can work around it, because I am a better person. But sometimes Ghetto Gallant comes out, and I put my hair in a ponytail, take my earrings out, and I want to throw down. Instead of acting on that, I lock myself in a room until I can get it together, tap my third eye, awaken my peaceful spirit, and make an honest effort not to get arrested at work for physical violence.
So my goal for tomorrow is spend a little time meditating before I go to work. I really need to get myself to a good place before I enter that building again.
OH, and I get to see Alisa and Luca tomorrow too, and I'm so excited to smooch that little man and tell him how handsome he is :)
5 Thankful Things
1. Good Hair. My hair generally never lets me down.
2. Laughter. I love it.
3. My sister, I love our relationship, it's gotten really cool in the last few years.
4. People who say, Mmmmmmmmmm, after they've eaten something I've baked. It's my favorite.
5. Coffee. I'm from Seattle, and I will NEVER give it up. I love it too much.
Tuesday, February 1, 2011
Shit is getting REAL
In the last two weeks, with the weather being shit, and not being able to do my weigh ins and meetings due to cancellations, and not being able to go to my classes because of my flu for the last week...well...I feel like crap.
I feel dangerously close to falling off the deep end. This is a perfect storm for me to give up, lose motivation, and fall into bad habits. This scares the hell out of me.
Today, I am thankful for this blog, to have a way to cry for help, or at least cry "uh oh, shit is getting real, and I'm scared I won't succeed."
I am thankful for all of you, so that I can be honest and not feel judged about this crazy up and down struggle, it is so comforting to know I'm not in this alone.
I ate within my points today, I did not go to the gym, as it's not safe to drive because of ice covering the streets.
Tomorrow, I really want to be active, because not being active, makes me feel anxious and depressed.
UGGGGGG!
Tomorrow, I pray for a more positive day.
5 Gratitudes
I am grateful for my FT sisters
I am grateful for self awareness
I am grateful for my doggie, who is SO happy to see me, everytime I walk into the room he throws a party for me :)
I am grateful for all of my nieces and nephews, including my best ladies kids, who are just as dear to me as the 'official' ones ;) (Luca, Mia, baby Blanchard on the way, you make Auntie April's heart MELT)
I am grateful for forgiveness. To myself, and to others, Everyone deserves it in my book.
LOVES and Goodnights to you all. xoxo - Gallant
I feel dangerously close to falling off the deep end. This is a perfect storm for me to give up, lose motivation, and fall into bad habits. This scares the hell out of me.
Today, I am thankful for this blog, to have a way to cry for help, or at least cry "uh oh, shit is getting real, and I'm scared I won't succeed."
I am thankful for all of you, so that I can be honest and not feel judged about this crazy up and down struggle, it is so comforting to know I'm not in this alone.
I ate within my points today, I did not go to the gym, as it's not safe to drive because of ice covering the streets.
Tomorrow, I really want to be active, because not being active, makes me feel anxious and depressed.
UGGGGGG!
Tomorrow, I pray for a more positive day.
5 Gratitudes
I am grateful for my FT sisters
I am grateful for self awareness
I am grateful for my doggie, who is SO happy to see me, everytime I walk into the room he throws a party for me :)
I am grateful for all of my nieces and nephews, including my best ladies kids, who are just as dear to me as the 'official' ones ;) (Luca, Mia, baby Blanchard on the way, you make Auntie April's heart MELT)
I am grateful for forgiveness. To myself, and to others, Everyone deserves it in my book.
LOVES and Goodnights to you all. xoxo - Gallant
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